A 6 year old losing his mind over a tablet is doing something his brain is physically incapable of stopping.
The apps kids use run on a variable ratio reinforcement schedule. The reward lands after an unpredictable number of taps. Sometimes the next level, sometimes a new character, sometimes nothing. Behavioral scientists proved in the 1950s that this exact pattern produces the most compulsive, hardest to extinguish behavior of any reward structure ever tested. It is the same schedule slot machines run on.
Now point that at a 6 year old. The prefrontal cortex, the part that handles impulse control and delayed gratification, does not finish wiring until the mid 20s. In a 6 year old it is barely online. So the parent is asking a child to self-regulate against software tuned by teams of adult engineers to be maximally compelling, using the one reinforcement pattern evolution made hardest to resist.
"No amount of time was ever enough" is tolerance. The reward system adapts to the dose, the same screen time stops landing, the brain demands more. Standard addiction curve.
"A fight every single day" is what happens when you cut off a variable ratio reward. The behavior spikes before it fades, because the brain learned that pushing harder eventually pays. The tantrum is the system working as designed, not the kid being difficult.
"3 hours later he was a different kid" is the tell. That is roughly how long a young, overstimulated dopamine system needs to settle back toward baseline. The flat, irritable version was withdrawal. The child who showed up after lunch was the actual child.
The kid was never the problem. He was outgunned by software the smartest behavioral scientists alive helped design, carrying a brain that will not have the hardware to fight back for another 20 years.
The iPad kid epidemic is going to be looked back on as one of the biggest parenting mistakes of the 2010s and 2020s....