She's measuring the wrong variable.
Time spent with your kids is not what raises them. The research is clear. Judith Rich Harris laid it out decades ago. Peer socialization is the dominant force in child development. Not parental attention. Not "quality time." The peer group does the work.
And nine kids creates something most modern families cannot buy. A stratified age group under one roof. Older siblings teaching younger ones conflict resolution, social hierarchy, cooperation. Kids learning to negotiate with people 2, 5, 8 years ahead of them. This is how humans raised children for 200,000 years. Mixed-age groups figuring it out together while adults handled adult problems. The tribe did the heavy lifting.
The modern obsession with "adequate time and attention" per child is a broken framework. Two parents hovering over one or two kids produces anxious, poorly socialized children who never had to negotiate with a real peer group. The parenting debates themselves cause the community destruction that actually damages children.
Nine siblings is a tribe. The tribe is what raises children. Always has been.
There is definitely an element of "I am his world" female wish fulfilment going on with some of the parenting theory stuff.
My Dad (b1950) is an only child, but his early childhood memories are mainly about time spent with his many cousins & the kids of my grandparents friends.
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